Welcome to my circus.

A Life in Status- April #3, 2017


I’d love to have you join me on Facebook and Twitter.

8 year-old got out of bed with a pressing question: Does The Baby have an imagination because I’ve never seen him use it.

Danny (8): I like how this house has a spider staircase. No. . . it’s not spider. SPIRAL.

I was almost out of my usual hair product, so I borrowed my daughter’s and now I’ve pretty much looked like a wet cocker spaniel all day.

Joel (5): Mom, we saw an Easter bunny in the backyard and we chased the Easter bunny. But you don’t want to catch an Easter bunny. They might have rabies.

My child thinks the Ed Sheeran song (that he hears on the bus) says, “I’m in love with somebody.” I think I like his version better.

Last night was one of those nights where you’re supervising toddler bath times and giving advice about appropriate boundaries at prom.
#7kids #2to19 #weloveournormal

If you hear a child yell, “TOILET PAPER FIGHT!” from the other room, you may have let independent playtime go on a little too long.

Carrie (3): Mom, the juice coming out of my eyes!

Bethany (7): This is my favorite dinner ever. Mom, you are the best cooker. Can you teach me all your cooking secrets?
#easytoplease #bakedpotatonight #youcantruinbakedpotatoes

Who has two thumbs and cried all the way through her child singing “You Can’t Stop the Beat” at the school choir concert? (points thumbs at self) This guy.
#goodtearsIpromise #lovehim #Hairspraymakesmecry

Reached into Danny’s backpack and had a minor heart attack until I remembered he has been taking his favorite comfort object to school and that comfort object is an actual raccoon tail.
#grabbedsomethingfurry #mayhavescreamed

-Reading a post about a potential sex trafficking abduction-
Lady was just wandering the aisles, not really looking at anything. Nothing much in her cart. Just touching things on the shelves and staring off into space. Then she started making really bold eye contact with my kids and coming towards me. . .
-Starts panicking that the woman is describing me at Target last night-
#dontwanttostealyourkids #justreallylikekids#andsometimesIaimlesslywanderatTarget

I was just looking at some of the behind the scenes information about my blog and saw somebody landed on it after googling a particularly raunchy porn description. I would just like to thank Jesus and Google for sending that person my direction and I’m really hoping they stayed for a little bit after figuring out they were NOT going to get the experience they were looking for.
#SURPRISE #nowletstalkaboutthedamageofporn#howdoImakethishappenmoreoften

Contemplating this 20+ hour road trip and briefly considered getting Pull-ups for EVERYONE.

Okay, I’m going to try and make this quick:
STOP SHARING THE “Almost Sex Trafficked” STORIES.
-If you share one that has a picture attached, just imagine the damage you’ve done to that person’s reputation with no proof that they’ve done anything wrong. You want that done to your socially awkward cousin or overly friendly neighbor?
-There are ACTUAL victims of sex trafficking and all this fear mongering puts our focus in the wrong direction. The VAST majority of sex trafficked kids are kids who have had interactions with Child Welfare because of abuse or neglect issues at home. These are NOT kids who are well-attended by their protective mothers at department stores. The risks of abducting those kids in broad daylight in a public place are ridiculously high.
-We KNOW those kind of abductions are rare, but we continue to be paranoid about them. How many Amber Alerts are you getting regularly? Not many. And how many of them were total stranger abductions vs. abduction by a non-custodial parent or someone known to the child? Why do we act like these abductions are happening more and more frequently when statistically they are exceedingly rare? What IS happening more frequently are viral stories about ALMOST abductions that are making us all paranoid.
-When you focus all your worry on strangers in department stores, you may not be acknowledging the actual sources of danger for your kids. Kids are most likely to be abused by someone they know. Quit worrying about the odd guy at Target and start paying more attention to who might be grooming your child for abuse right under your nose.
-When we parent out of paranoia, we make parenting decisions that cripple our kids. They need a level of freedom to learn how to make wise decisions for themselves. They need to know if they had an emergency, it would be okay for them to talk to a helpful stranger (PLEASE teach your kids about “tricky people” rather than “stranger danger”). They don’t need to grow up with the anxiety of worrying that a child snatcher is waiting around every corner.
-We do NOT live in a statistically less safe world than the one we grew up in, we are just more aware of the problems that happen because of 24/7 news coverage. Sharing these almost abduction stories is contributing to the problem.

Weird guys in public places are not always sex traffickers. I support women listening to their instincts if they feel uncomfortable, but be cautious about inferring too much from those interactions.


8 year-old just ended a letter with “sinceriously.”
#soclose #sincerely #serious

Bethany: I’m so excited about our trip! We’ll get to see PIGEONS!
#itsthesimplethings #BradleystakeDC

(Three blocks from home.)
#soclose #WhiteHouse #20hourstodrive #BradleystakeDC

If you happen to see a large bird on the side of the road, don’t yell, “Big Bird” and point out the window or your small children will look for a giant yellow Muppet and be very disappointed.

Spent last night with old friends. Ten kids altogether and the oldest was ten. I think my kids may remember that more fondly than the museums we’re heading towards.
#bravefriends #largefamiliescantdohotels #BradleystakeDC#friendsarefriendsforever

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