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There’s no such thing as Balance (radio interview)

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Each month at the end of the radio interview I do with Gordon and Stan I ask what topic they want to cover for the following month. Sometimes Stan has ideas, sometimes we base it around something seasonal, and sometimes in a moment of desperation I tell Stan I need some help thinking through something. This topic was definitely one of those desperation moments.

I’ve been struggling with trying to find the ever illusive “balance” in my life and realizing maybe it’s never going to happen. And maybe that’s okay. Have you ever seen somebody spinning plates on poles? It’s a crazy thing to watch as they run from one pole to the next to keep everything at this perfect rotational speed so nothing drops. That’s what my life feels like. Sometimes I feel like I’m just barely keeping everything going and sometimes the plates just start dropping. Have my week perfectly planned out and then a child gets sick and I have to cancel plans. Plate dropped. I buy enough cereal to last until the next grocery trip and then the two year-old dumps a box out on the floor. Plate dropped. I forget my mother-in-law’s birthday. BIG plate dropped. You get the idea. I’m tired of living in the chaos of spinning plates, but it’s hard to know how to prioritize when every day feels like a gameshow I’m on called, “What Crisis Will Befall Us Today?” It’s an interesting game show, but I rarely feel like I win.

So I was thankful for this Morning Conversation where I could talk to Stan about some of that stress. I know how these interviews usually go and I feel like you can hear the desperation in my voice a little more than usual. There’s a gem in here from Stan that Brian and I have been repeating since I recorded this interview a couple weeks ago: ¬†Everybody will always want all of you. It’s true and being a good steward of your time and priorities is often going to mean telling people “no.” I hope this is as helpful for you as it was for me. Listen to the link below or read the bullet points beneath it to get a general idea of what we discussed.

-I am in a busy season of life. Many other moms are, too. ¬†It’s really difficult to know how to prioritize during this time.

-Having an expectation that we will be able to achieve “balance” may be setting us up for failure. When we toss that idea, we may be able to find more healthy priorities with a realization that we can’t make everybody happy.

-Sometimes being a mom isn’t rewarding. *GASP* It’s a struggle to see things how God sees them when I’d rather do what seems fun for me or what will give me a reward. It’s hard to say “no” to people, especially if I selfishly want to say “yes.”

-We have to prioritize our relationship with The Lord, although investing in that relationship may look different during this season of life than the ideal we have in our mind. Making that relationship the priority will help keep the other obligations in the right perspective.

-My ego becomes a problem when I want to prove how on top of things I am by agreeing to do things I really shouldn’t. It’s good in that moment to listen to the wise counsel of others who see how overcommitted you are.

-I can’t let guilt (especially “spiritual” guilt) push me into becoming overcommitted. I have to step back and even be willing to let others help and minister to me as we’re in a very busy season.

 

2 Comments

  1. Oh, I needed this – thank you :) Playing Mama (for the first time) to nearly 7 month old twins, one of whom has spent the majority of the last 3 months in the hospital has contributed to my life having absolutely no balance :)

    • Oh wow, Megan! Bless you for taking that on! Expect no balance for quite a while as you get things figured out. I haven’t done twins, but I have potty-trained two kids at once (two of ours are 9 months apart) so when/if you get to that stage, let me know and we can talk :)

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