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A Life in Status- January #2, 2015

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In case you’re wondering, it is possible to cry about the fact that your baby is big enough to move out of your room at night and into his own and ALSO cry about the fact that your nearly six year-old keeps leaving his room at night to come into yours.

I am currently making Spite Brownies. You know- brownies you’re making only for the purpose of denying them to a child who is in trouble. (Don’t feel too sorry for him- he snuck a donut when he was supposed to be napping.)
‪#‎momconfession‬

Me (staring sadly at the disassembled bassinet): He just got big so fast.
Brian: I hate to break it to you, but he was born big.
‪#‎fact‬ ‪#‎10pounder‬

Maybe you shouldn’t laugh at your kids, but it’s kind of hard when the five year-old tries to get out of having to go to bed by saying her nose hurts when she touches it.

Last night I made Spite Brownies (brownies you make for the purpose of denying them to a naughty child) to punish a child who snuck down during nap time and ate a donut. Today he snuck down during nap time and ate the Spite Brownies.
‪#‎shouldhaveseenthatcoming‬ ‪#‎nomorenapsformom‬

Joel (age 3): You’re my birth mom. That’s my birth dad.
Me: Um, yeah, I guess that’s true.
J (pointing at the baby): And he’s my birth Teddy!
‪#‎adoptivefamilyproblems‬ ‪#‎biologicalbrothers‬

Brian and I were leading music for church tonight. Our three year-old sat on the front row and right as we started the first song he yelled, “I have to POOP, MOM!” I may have missed the first song, but some things can’t be delegated.
‪#‎motherhood‬

We are blessed to be living a little piece of this dream today:

I have a dream that one day this nation will rise up and live out the true meaning of its creed: “We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal.”

I have a dream that one day on the red hills of Georgia, the sons of former slaves and the sons of former slave owners will be able to sit down together at the table of brotherhood.

I have a dream that one day even the state of Mississippi, a state sweltering with the heat of injustice, sweltering with the heat of oppression, will be transformed into an oasis of freedom and justice.

I have a dream that my four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin but by the content of their character.

I have a dream today!

I have a dream that one day, down in Alabama, with its vicious racists, with its governor having his lips dripping with the words of “interposition” and “nullification” — one day right there in Alabama little black boys and black girls will be able to join hands with little white boys and white girls as sisters and brothers.

I have a dream today!

I have a dream that one day every valley shall be exalted, and every hill and mountain shall be made low, the rough places will be made plain, and the crooked places will be made straight; “and the glory of the Lord shall be revealed and all flesh shall see it together.”

-Martin Luther King Jr. August 28th, 1963

A Musing Maralee's photo.

Brian: You can either do what you want and stop complaining about what the pediatrician will say, or you can do what the pediatrician said and stop complaining about what you want to do.
‪#‎breastfeeding‬ ‪#‎husbandlogic‬ ‪#‎hatewhenhesright‬

I don’t care how mature you think you are, when your kid is fake crying so hard he farts, you’re going to laugh.

How to get the most out of your hamburger:
-Buy 3 pounds of hamburger
-Divide it into 5 baggies
-Tell yourself each bag is 1 pound
‪#‎yourewelcome‬

Nothing says “Happy Birthday, Mom” like a kid waking you up at 4 a.m. to tell you he wet the bed.
‪#‎noholidaysformom‬ ‪#‎wouldnttradeit

Foster Mom Tip: When talking about your fostering situation on social media, imagine that someday you and the biological family could be friends. Would you still feel comfortable with what you’ve said? If not, don’t post it.

“Basically” = a word that when used by eight year-olds means “not even close.” i.e. “My room is clean. Basically” or “My homework is basically done.”
‪#‎notbuyingit‬

I do not post pictures of my children in their carseats. . . because I do not wish to have my parenting skills, intellect and love for my children judged by 1000 of my closest friends.
‪#‎safetyisimportant‬ ‪#‎catchmoreflieswithhoney‬

(counting out 100 Cheerios to send with Danny for the 100th day of school) Me: So we just need to count out 5 more groups of ten because we already have- are you eating Cheerios out of the pile we ALREADY COUNTED?
(Repeat 3 more times before we got finished)
Maybe we shouldn’t have picked something edible.

I’ll be taking Teddy (3 months) to his second meeting of the day regarding our family’s involvement in foster care (I’m not ready to leave him with a sitter yet). In the same way I love seeing babies in church, I love seeing babies in foster care meetings. I hope the passion and words spoken around him will build into him a concern for families in crisis and a desire to be involved in finding solutions.
‪#‎futureadvocate‬ . . .‪#‎nopressure

I used to feel guilty if my baby had a bald spot on the back of his head because I assumed it meant I wasn’t picking him up enough. Now I choose to believe it is because I am an awesome mom who always follows the recommendations of the Back to Sleep campaign.

You go to the gym. I carry a 25 pound toddler up and down the stairs 37 times a day.
‪#‎potaytopotahto‬

Me: What are you doing?
Daughter (realizing her excessive eye-roll about our dinner menu was about to get her in trouble): Nothing, Mom. I was just. . . stretching my neck muscles out. (repeats eye-roll with a neck stretch)
‪#‎closeone‬

My vaccine post from yesterday has gone a little viral. Is that ironic or a pun?
‪#‎wordnerd‬

If someone was doing a study of my coffee consumption habits over the last three years, I think they would determine that I have been systematically trying to build up an immunity.

I was searching the house to figure out where the poop smell was coming from, but it seemed like it was EVERYWHERE. Turns out it was from the silent toddler that was two steps behind me during my entire quest.
‪#‎mysterysolved‬

I feel like my family is in that awkward in-between place where nobody knows what to think of us. You know, somewhere between “normal” and “Duggar”.
‪#‎sixkids‬

My daughter is crying because unicorns are not real.

As part of the three year-old’s eye exam the nurse had him identify a picture of a star, a moon, a flag and a cup. He could identify all of them except the cup. . . which he called “coffee”. . .

Daughter: Mom, are pancakes a. . . a food hand?
Translation- finger food
‪#‎momtranslationskillz‬

Anybody else get a little choked up when Daniel Tiger puts on his cardigan and sneakers?
‪#‎missyouMrRogers‬

My daughter is crying because snow pants are not tight.

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