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I’m Done Apologizing for My Apologies

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I was late to a meeting this morning. It was absolutely unavoidable because I had to drop my kids off at school (which starts at 9 a.m.) before I could head over to the meeting across town (which also started at 9 a.m.). I hate being late.

As I got closer to my destination I imagined walking into the meeting and what I would need to say to own my lateness. As I contemplated my options, I heard the voice of all the empowered ladies in my ear. Don’t apologize! Say “Thank you for waiting on me” and move along. You didn’t do anything wrong, so why are you apologizing?

That just didn’t sit well with me.

I hate being late and I hate when other people are late. You know what diffuses that? When someone owns it. When they don’t make excuses, but they do acknowledge how irritating it is when you’re made to wait without understanding why. If someone walked into a room where I’d been waiting on them for fifteen minutes and said, “Thank you for waiting on me” I don’t think I’d feel very forgiving. I think that would just increase my irritation that they not only made me wait, but then acted like that was a conscious choice I made that was deserving of thanks.

This is one small example in a world where we hurt, offend, inconvenience, and frustrate strangers and friends on a daily basis. When we realize our error, it’s time to acknowledge it. We don’t need to dance around it or make excuses. We don’t need to beat ourselves up about it. We just need to own our error– intentional or accidental– and keep moving.

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